Don’t Be Like Me


As foretold, foreshadowed, prophesied and predicted, all this bother at the salt mine is taking up a lot of my valuable time and energy. There does not seem to be much in the way of time scheduled for me write amusing anecdotes or draw amusing illustrations for them, so what you get is this: the above scrawl of the Xmas Bunny and the New Year’s Frog done, I promise you, as a mnemonic device for remembering some of the more arcane trivia of the salt mining trade (but don’t ask me which, because I have forgotten); and the following unrelated incident report from yesterday:

Daffodil: “Have the snake monsters come back?”

Me: (trying to wake all the way up and remember whether the snake monsters were nice monsters or mean monsters, and failing) “Uh… no… they went to Florida.” (We now know more or less where Florida is, see Celestial Mechanics).

Daffodil: “Awww… I miss them. ” Oops.

Me: “Well, I suppose they’ll come back when the weather warms up.”

Daffodil: “I’m going to call them.” (mimes dialing a cellphone (can I say ‘dialing a cellphone? They don’t have dials…))

Daffodil: (waits patiently for someone to pick up) “Hello? Snake Monsters? Hi! I just wanted to call and tell you how much I miss you.”

Daffodil: “Oh? Is it nice there?”

Daffodil: “Well, I understand, but I really miss you and I want you to come home.”

Daffodil: “Oh, don’t be like that.”

Daffodil: “No, really, you should come home.”

Daffodil: “Don’t say that! Don’t be like that!”

Daffodil: “Don’t be so dramatical!”

Daffodil: “You’re making too big a deal out of it! Try to relax.”

Daffodil: “Just do it my way.”

Daffodil: “Don’t be a Drama Llama! Don’t be so dramatic!”

Daffodil: “Don’t be like me!”

Me: “Are they coming back?”

Daffodil: “No.”